In 2020 dating is like it would be easy. Dating apps use AI to find the person that is statistically most likely to be a match for you. And then there are plenty of hook up sites like that will help you find a casual fling if you’re ready to settle down yet.
Then there are even specialized dating apps for Christians, Muslims, vegans and even farmers looking for love.
Yet, dating these days is actually quite complicated and there are many people still looking for the perfect solution for them even with the abundance of dating sites.
What is it with modern life that makes it so difficult to find the right person to settle down with. Even just finding the right person to spend time with and try to judge whether that person is right long term seems to be too much to ask.
As a result, there are a lot more single people out there than we would think there would be.
In this article, we will take a look in 2020 dating is like and why it is such a challenge these days.
Social media
One of the worst influences over dating and modern life in general is social media. What would this have to do with dating?
Well, imagine your life is somewhat unfulfilled and you want to find that special someone. You’re browsing your social media account and all you see are people showing off their incredible life. They take pictures from exotic locales while you slave away at a job you don’t like. They often post pictures of them relaxed and just enjoying every moment.
Then when you do find a date, you are always trying to capture that life that you see on social media and end up feeling let down that it isn’t working out that way. It must be the person you are dating, you reason.
The reality is that most people are only showing us the good moments. If social media showed the days you are just cleaning up and doing laundry and then a few hours spent watching Netflix then maybe you wouldn’t feel so bad about your own prospects.
Too much choice
Think about when you are at the mall and are looking for a shirt. Once there, you are faced with an entire wall of choices. Every color you can imagine and the styles all over the place. You end up walking out of the store with nothing more often than finding the right shirt unless you knew exactly what you wanted.
The problem is that we get overwhelmed by choice and so it makes it hard to settle on one. The same goes for dating so when you have dating apps with hundreds of potential partners to choose from, then the friends trying to set you up and the single people that you work with, you end up not choosing anything.
Overthinking
Another issue that makes it difficult to find a partner is the fact that we often want to “try on” a lot of different fits before settling on a person or item. Sort of like going to a car dealer and wanting to test drive every car that catches your eye.
We’re afraid of making a poor choice and so we overthink every aspect of our date and think that maybe the next one will have more of the positive attributes that we are looking for.
It sounds superficial, and it is, but this is the new reality for a lot of people. They end up trying to think and reason through a process that is more about emotion and feelings.
This doesn’t mean settle for the first person you go on a date with but think less about the process as being linear with clear results. In 2020 dating is like it takes time and some things that might have been a deal-breaker previously becomes endearing as you get to know a person.
Too busy
Probably the biggest barrier to finding Mr or Ms Right is that we are far too busy these days. Many people work too much and then have responsibilities outside of the office that are trying to squeeze in time for somebody else. Even when we find the potential person we would be happy with, we end up drifting apart because it is hard to maintain the flame when we don’t spend enough time together.
It’s difficult to make time for somebody else, but it is vital to do so to help a relationship flourish.
